Dear Lo,

Thank you in advance for taking the time to reply to my question (or two!).

My first question was a result of your webinar about people pleasing. You mentioned that we often get frustrated because we expect people to read our minds about our wants and wishes, but if we are always asking someone to do things that we would like, how do we know that they do them because they want to rather than being forced to do it?

Irrespective of people-pleasing, I have caught myself being codependent with my current partner of 7 years. Do you think that it is still possible to work on my codependency issues while being with him or do you think that it's not possible to do that and if I want to work on these issues I should end the relationship?

Thank you!

P.S. Your webinars are amazing and you are a great communicator!

Hi Lo,

I am a people-pleaser with those with whom I share an emotional connection with, especially romantic interests. Any kind of conflict with someone I'm emotionally connected to will lead to abandonment anxiety. So I need to be a people-pleaser to not only avoid her possibly departing out of my life, but also so that she can see me as perfect and someone she'd want in her life. If I'm not perfect in her eyes, she probably won't want me.

I really need help overcoming this so that I'm able to establish a healthy relationship without any abandonment anxiety, without being a people-pleaser, and with healthy boundaries. I have my therapist helping me through this as well, which I'm very thankful for. And I watched your presentation on Better Help on this topic. Thank you!

~Gabriel